Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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