I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
