Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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