On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
