I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize