If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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