Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry kreesta hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(678): View more from Georgia

So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup

Fav 88 4872 1298
share tweet
(586): View more from Michigan

Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.

Fav 41 6375 1335
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(361): View more from Texas

I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.

Fav 11 1553 4250
share tweet
(330): View more from Ohio

I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.

Fav 32 4763 1386
share tweet
(651): View more from Minnesota

I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.

Fav 11 1522 4153
share tweet
(708): View more from Illinois

It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.

Fav 12 1207 841
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(920): View more from Wisconsin

Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.

Fav 0 1124 988
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+61): View more from Australia

I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.

Fav 9 33 178
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(705): View more from Ontario

Two words: nipple clamps

Fav 0 67 16
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT