I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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