It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
