In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
