Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
