Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
