she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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