you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
