The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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