Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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