that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize