I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
