I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
