She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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