It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Randomize
