He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
