The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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