He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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