Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Randomize