I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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