I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize