You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
