That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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