i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
