we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just saw a hot homeless man
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Just high enough for therapy.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
