Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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