worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
There r osticjed everywhere
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
