also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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