funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize