I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
