do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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