I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize