found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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