He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize