dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Just invented taco cereal.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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