walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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