Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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