first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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