One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize