i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
