I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize