what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
