ADVERTISEMENT

• (407): View more from Florida

  Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.

  Fav 25 1156 3717

  share tweet
  

• (513): View more from Ohio

  did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness

  Fav 70 1256 5903

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (703): View more from Virginia

  Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.

  Fav 8 3930 1202

  share tweet
  

• (757): View more from Virginia

  I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.

  Fav 8 1123 1529

  share tweet
  

• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.

  Fav 7 2554 974

  share tweet
  

• (815): View more from Illinois

  Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !

  (779): View more from Illinois

  You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.

  Fav 7 1347 1025

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (479): View more from Arkansas

  Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.

  Fav 4 2796 700

  share tweet
  

• (925): View more from California

  Are sex swings allowed in dorms

  Fav 7 1348 601

  share tweet
  

• (408): View more from California

  Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.

  Fav 1 685 567

  share tweet
  

• (217): View more from Illinois

  Do one night stands count towards my number?

  (516): View more from New York

  Yes. A penis is a penis

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Even bad ones?

  (516): View more from New York

  YES.

  Fav 0 883 655

  share tweet
  

• (727): View more from Florida

  Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.

  Fav 9 1470 779

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (985): View more from Louisiana

  Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.

  Fav 0 413 196

  share tweet
  

• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker

  Fav 0 350 150

  share tweet
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.

  Fav 3 272 295

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (618): View more from Illinois

  I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.

  Fav 0 253 195

  share tweet
  

Randomize