Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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