And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize