That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
